Small Paintings, Big Zen

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I recently sold a small painting (left) to a 77 year old woman who thought the painting was "hot".  I just love that -- not that the painting was hot, which it was, but that a 77 year old woman thought it was hot and bought it! Applause to dynamic, confident older women.  They give me something to grasp onto as this aging thing approaches. Plus, at dinner, I got fabulous life and love advice. #followit

Since the "Back It Up" show in Savannah went well, something had to give, right?  The day after I closed the show I dashed to Florida as my mother had a stroke a week prior.  I can't express what this means because unless you are actually a caretaker of someone with a stroke, you can't possibly know the weight it is, emotional, pychological and physical.  I wasn't prepared for the reality.  My summer plans are changed.  My day to day psychology totally affected.  I bought red lipstick to brighten up the frown I'm trying to turn upside down.  

In a few weeks I drive out to Las Vegas to drop off 20 paintings for a 2 month solo show and that's pretty overwhelming with everything else on my plate with lots more changes on the way.  I decided one of the best things I can do is make more art and to not get overwhelmed by it, go small.  The point of "size matters" is absolutely relavtive to what you're looking to accomplish.  

Though I'm co-teaching a class on the Old Master's Method in July that I'm ridiculously thrilled about, I am determined to find time to create a few small, sexy paintings or drawings that won't take weeks or months to complete but rather hours to days.  I begin art passionately and then get too involved when I love it and then try to make it perfect and then it's a spiral of good enough vs not good enough. I don't have time for such value judgments this summer, plus I don't possess the mental capacity to begin a new long term commitment such as one of my usual larger paintings.  Going small is like wrapping me up in a straight jacket and saying, "paint!"... but you know, I can do it when I put my mind to it. There are ways. Everthing is mind over matter except usually our matters are stronger than our minds. 

If you want to keep up with what I create as I work on it this summer, connect with me on Instagram because that's where I'll be posting primarily and I will be back on the blog once I have a few pieces to show or something to talk about.  I don't have much to say right now.  Life has thrown me a curve ball and I have to manage it focused. 

I struggle to make art when I am stressed or overwhelmed so I hope a few small, "don't need to be perfect" kind of pieces would be a good step to continue an artistic flow because we artists deal with artists block too.  It is too easy to have life overtake the creative expressions that make artists move forward.  When I was a writer, all the writer's advice was "write!".  Artists need to make art.  Creators create. It's just too easy to let external life circumstances effect the production value of all of us.  Health and balance for me right now - zen health - is my primary need and making art helps me find that zen feeling... even though I'd rather swap out the "Z" and the "N" for "S" and an "X".  :) From a zen type place though, good and sexy concepts can flow and the art makes itself. Stress hijacks the soul. Just breathe and go.  

"Back it Up" Show Pics & Thanks

 
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Ok everyone, kiss my sneak peek show goodbye! "Back It Up" is backing it out towards Las Vegas to hang as part of the full ArtPorn collection of 20 paintings at the Erotic Heritage Museum Aug 5-Sept 30


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A HUGE thank you to all the brave & open minded & curious souls in Savannah who visited my sneak peek show before it goes to Las Vegas next month. I loved meeting everyone and this show's quality outbeat the last show's quantity and silly controversy. This show gave me what I sought: intelligent and engaging conversations about human sexuality, not bullshit about size and shame, like my first 2015 show did (read here, nsfw).

I met some amazing people I hope to know better. Overall the concensus was that the art was "wonderful", "brave" and "much more explicit than expected". Ah, of course: it's porn in art form... but does it then become "erotica"?

Click here to view more show photos (nsfw), testimonials and some small sneak peeks at the paintings until I post the high quality images in August.

Kisses, Tatiana von Tauber

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Down the Hibiscus Road

...a few thoughts about the show's content before the show:

Sexuality creates life, nourishes love and provides pleasure.  How this can be shameful is only by mere construct of Human based fear and control. 

Typically I'm somewhat of a worrier rather than a warrior but over the past few years I've been working to change that and to a large degree, I've succeeded.  The freedom that comes with not giving a shit when you can't change certain circumstances or people cannot be overstated: worth the effort.  With it, however, comes pain because there's a process of having to feel - and thus to understand - the difference between truly not giving a shit to just not giving your time to the worry that will often hardly change anything.  It's not an easy road. A slippery slope took my foot in 2011 and it's really never been terrific since.  In 2014 I took control in a flow kind of way: I trusted the intuitive and passionate path no matter how crazy it seemed, and that path led me to creating the ART PORN collection.  I swear I was shocked at my commitment and completion and terrified at the thought of its exhibition but it all flowed rather well.  

Since I'm in the American South for this 2 day sneak peek show before it heads to Sin City,  I'll say it: "I'm doing God's work."  This is valuable to be understood when "in Rome" to do "as the Roman's do".  If one wants to be understood, one must speak the correct language and to me, sexuality is a universal language except my environment has ear muffs on -- so, I follow my intuition and strong sense of spirit and I listen to the voice within and here I am, backing it up, in Savannah, again.  Sexuality creates life, nourishes love and provides pleasure.  How this can be shameful is only by mere construct of Human based fear and control. It's undeserving to all of us.  I still stand with my original view of porn when taken to its core basics (yes it can be more complex but you've got to accept its naked truth before you put on the clothing to manipulate its meaning): 

Sexuality is universal, and pornography acts merely as the unedited documentation of sexual behaviors.

I certainly don't want to only make pornographic and erotic content for art but there are way too few female artists who do and so I step up to take that challenge on, to contribute a feminine view of sex, porn and eroticism to the supersaturation of porn out there.  It doesn't have to be in your face but it doesn't have to be hidden in the closet nor should it break marriages apart. It's a part of ourselves that needs a tweak of a peek, not shame or banishment.

I make art that represents our most primal acts, that require elegant representation in an era of raunch culture (and I consider this merely an evolutionary state derived from feminism but that's an entirely different post) as well as an era of virtual porn where truth isn't hidden by eroticism or romanticism: "Just fuck me" as one might say.

My take on sexuality or pornography is no less valuable than anyone else who projects their take but to be added to the avenue of choices is the road less traveled by women -- and even less so by women who live in conservative landscapes.

I look forward to meeting everyone at the show this upcoming first weekend in June.  Here are details if you need them.

Tatiana von Tauber