Boudoir Photos? But I'm not a model!

8  Valid Reasons For Women to Document Their Not-so Perfect Body with a Boudoir Shoot

In my boudoir photography business*, "But I'm not a model" is the prime excuse that comes up when a woman is deciding if she's "good enough" to justify boudoir photographs for herself, after of course, "I've got to loose weight."

So, sit back and let's go over a few reasons why this view is holding women back in ways of confidence, self-respect, personal growth and a lot of fun.

I don't want to hear this "When I loose weight" thing if you fall in this category. Believe me, I get you. I fall into that trap too but let me put it to you straight: life is fast and do you really think you're going to look sexier a year or two or three or five from now? Great. Do it then. Do it now, loose that weight, make it happen because one or two or three or five years will be here before you ever commit for real. Been there, done that, know it well. Don't do it now and you've lost on your chance of documenting the best you that you could have been at a time that will never come back for you to redo. You might find accepting yourself as you are, weight and all is not as intimidating as you feel or think so focus on the best part of what you've got to offer if you're not willing to make the hard commitment choices to "get in shape" enough to gift yourself a boudoir shoot. I just really want to make the strong point that we, women specifically, put everyone else first and as time goes by, so does our life. Women just don't celebrate themselves enough and so this kind of a photo shoot takes care of that unfortunate reality.  Good thing I know a thing or two about the business to help you. :)

Here's your 8 Valid Reasons to Document the Not-so Perfect Body with a Boudoir Shoot

  1. Every year you get older and your body deteriorates a little bit more. Don't let it go, abuse it or ignore it. Unless you're athletic or live an active lifestyle, at some point "older" is "what the fuck happened?!"  Don't get caught in this mess.
  2. You look better than you think.  A good boudoir photographer and team can prove it if your mirror can't. Correct lighting, positioning, make up, hair, styling, basically hours behind the scenes can make a woman look radiant and glamorous, because, that's what it takes when you see the perfection in the magazines. Unless you live a Kardashian life, reality is not constant beauty. So, you look great. Document it. Prove it.
  3. You're not into the boudoir frill.  I get that too.  Try a more natural documentation approach sans the boa, lingerie or heels.  You don't have to be sexy to be "you" if "you" isn't naturally sexy.  So be natural and stick with that as your sexy. Don't let anyone's vision of sensuality or sexy define yours and keep you from expressing or experiencing a side to yourself you might otherwise feel isn't worthy of photographing or enjoying. 
  4. You're uncomfortable naked.  Yes, so get in line. What better way to deal with it than to document your body at its natural state?  If photos are taken well, you'll gain a new appreciation for the body you have and the woman who is probably hidden underneath the clothes. Plus, you never really have to get naked.  You're in control of what you want to show and document and how.
  5. "I just don't know if I can do that."  Okay.  Neither do I.  Try or don't try. You're worth a try, no?
  6. "It's not in my budget."  Okay.  What is your budget? What do you want out of this? Photos or a full experience? What are you worth? Figure these out and the whole process will be smoother for you.
  7. "I'm too shy".  Again, yes, so get in line. A good boudoir/figure photographer will do her/his best to make you comfortable. It's part of the job because it directly affects the outcome of the photos. If you don't feel yourself with a boudoir photographer, find another one. This is personal and it's okay. 
  8. Husbands/boyfriends come and go but your body will always be yours. Celebrate it! My view on this is very different than most, I understand.  However, I stick with suggesting having your photos taken for *yourself* and not necessarily for the man in your life. Remember, ultimately, he's just the audience you're "allowed" to share it with but is it really "for him"? Need it be? Don't you love choice? :)  In the ideal end, however, you keep the album. You create the images you want to see of yourself. What are you comfortable with? What envelopes do you want to push? Who do you want to be? You decide.  Love is grand until the babies come and the weights of real life come, and the body doesn't come quite so often.  If you do this for a man, great but why not do it for you? Think about the fact that if you'd not be able to look at the photo album positively years from now in a similar way as you wouldn't be able to look at a wedding album should a breakup come, then you're doing it for the guy first and not yourself.  Just something to think about.  Not everyone falls in this category but you know who you are if you do so it's important I bring this up.  I'm supportive of pleasing the husband/boyfriend but I'm also aware a few shoots I've done are now shelved by divorces, albums bringing negative memories rather than positive. This is why if a woman has sensual photos taken for herself with intent to share with others (or not), she's placing her own value above a man's value of her. Finding self-value takes time, guts and self-reflection and this is one prime reason I feel body documentation and/or boudoir photos bring a fabulous and fun experience to the process of self-value building and its sustainability.

If you would like to discuss more or learn about a private boudoir/sensual body documentation photo shoot, visit my boudoir page for some general info to get you started.  Subscribe here to be placed on my Boudoir mailing list for news or special offer announcements.  Email me for bookings.


*Yes, I've returned to photography part time.  I missed it.  I'm still painting though, no worries there. :)

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